Mrs. Mecomber's Scrapbook

I admit, I have NEVER heard of the term “Qlog” before. Oops, and I think the letters are all capitalized: QLOG. And people who QLOG are called, uh, QLOGGERS. When I read words, I tend to hear them audibly in my head… so it is pronounced “KLOG” or “QWLOG”? (Oh, I see on her site it is pronounced “Clog.”)

Anyway, one of the more famous (or, notorious?) QLOGGERS is Amy Africa, at amyafrica.com. And she writes a lot like I do, actually– that stream of consciousness, why-do-these-crazy-things-always-happen-to-me kind of writing. Except that the purpose of her QLOG is educating the reader about usually boring stuff like online analytics, conversion, email marketing and sales techniques, etc. I NEVER would have guessed that such boring topics could be so delightfully cloaked in pink swirlies and entertaining gabble. I just LOVED “Why Epiphanes Never Occur to Couch Potatoes.”

So there I was…. stuck in the elevator… with Cruella de Vil, wondering how I could whack this wench without a Soprano and not upset my slightly-to-the-left-of-the-salad-fork mother.

Then I had an epiphany. This is EXACTLY what people do on the Internet. I see it all the time in our usability sessions. They just sit there… waiting for the next action to somehow miraculously happen – for a genie to pop out of their Bud bottle.

They find a product they like and never put it in their cart, choosing instead to abandon.

They “view their cart” and never hit the checkout button.

They get to the checkout and can’t be bothered to type in their e-mail address to move past the first page or Step 1 on the temperature bar.

They take one look at a lead/inquiry form and find it so overwhelming, they give up and leave.

Oh dear, she’s described me to a T. I searched around her site for a “What to Do if You Suffer Checkout Panic Attacks/Temperature-Bar Phobia” button, but saw none. However, Amy did give some good tips about slamming the final sale (all her QLOG posts have tips at the end of her funny stories), as well as dealing with miscellaneous Cruella De Vils in hotel elevators. Good one!

Amy also answers readers’ questions on her blog QLOG and crafts entire posts around them, which is very brassy. I love this style! I’ve GOT to do it myself sometime. All I need is for readers to start asking me some questions! (Come on, people, I know you have them).

The only bone to pick with Amy is that she is from Vermont she think New Yorkers are “ALWAYS late.” I’m not always late. I’m actually ALWAYS early. But then again, I am from UPSTATE New York, and we an’t got no subways ’round here (we ride dairy cows). And dairy cows HATE being late. haha. I won’t hold it against you, Amy….

So, is http://www.amyafrica.com the new wave in blogging? Er, QLOGGING? See for yourself.